It Never Leaves You Until You Let It Go

There was little I loved more than drinking. I loved how it made me feel, I loved what it represented (celebration, relaxation and jubilation) and I loved the taste of a good bottle of scotch. As I got older, and started my family, my love for alcohol never seemed to fade. I probably had a diagnosable alcohol addiction by the time I was 23, but it was never really an issue until I wanted to move forward with my life. Despite what, "functioning" alcoholics (whatever that term means) tell you, you can't have it all. It's either a relationship with alcohol or a normal life. 
 
When I first got married, I managed to keep alcohol at arm's length. But as time went on, and I got more and more complacent with my domestic situation, I wanted to drink more and more. My wife and I started fighting more and more about my viability as a husband and father, so I stopped drinking for three years so we could have a baby. I was never planning on going back to it, but about five years after my daughter was born, alcohol once again came beckoning. I was now faced with having to balance my alcoholism addiction while hiding it from my wife. 
 
I'm a terrible liar when I stone sober, so I had ZERO chance of hiding my intoxication from my wife. The first few weeks after I started drinking, she smelled it on me and threatened to file for separation. I swore I'd stop. True to form, however, I went back on my word and started distancing myself from my family in order to drink. It all came to a head one night when my co-worker dropped me off from the bar drunk, and talking non-sense. I woke up the next morning and saw that my wife was getting ready to leave with my child. 
 
I mustered all my strength and begged her to stay and work it out. She agreed to stay and work it out if I entered treatment for alcoholism addiction. Two days later, I was on a plane to Florida. As I made my way to rehab, I'll admit I had no idea if I was going to be able to follow through.  I was scared of being away from my family for so long, but knew that I'd be away from them forever if I didn't do this. After I arrived and went through detox, something extraordinary started happening to me: I actually started to want to stop drinking.  I thought about how senseless it was that I actually had to be here in the first place and started railing against my own weakness and shortcomings. 
 
With my pride and the love my family as motivation, I was able to successfully complete my treatment. I've been sober for well over five years, and am not anticipating a disastrous relapse, because I want to drink so much less and be with my family even more.  If you're going to successfully stop drinking, or anything else for that matter, you have to want to do it. 
 

Contact the National Alcoholism Center anytime toll-free at (888) 515-7704 or through our online form for our recommendations of the best alcohol treatment centers for you or your loved one!

Alcoholism treatment should never be attempted in your home or without medical supervision at a professional licensed treatment facility.